Waiter, this wine is corked
Calistoga. I've been here 2 days and already I'm a wine snob. In fact everyone here is a wine snob. I can't spit around the restaurant here without hearing someone say things like
“Can I get something with more oak ?”
“This is very dry”
“Yes, that would be a good season for the pinot”
Who are we fooling. Just because we have all spent the last few hours bouncing between wineries trying to grasp the finer differences between zinfandel and syrah doesn't make us an instant wine expert. Two weeks from now we will all be back at the supermarket buying five dollar bottles of no-name brand wine and convincing ourseleves that is “better than any of that overpriced crap you get in Napa”
Sigh. When in rome.
So instead of admiting out weaknesses, we feel overwhelmed by the wine lists in these places (which are very good, by the way) and hide our inadequaecy by doing dumb things like sniffing the cork, tasting things twice and pretending like we actually know what we are doing. In my case, I had to send back the wine.
I'm my own defence, I did get stuck with the dumbest barman in town. The dead giveway was when someone started a tab.
The guy handed the barman his credit card :
“Start a tab please.”
“And what name is that in ?”
“The name on the card perhaps ?”
“Oh”
I was victim to his style when I ordered said glass of wine. After tasting something nice, I ordered a glass of it. So he pours me the glass, I take a mouthfull, and it tastes completey different. It tastes bad, odd. It is just not the same.
Suddenly I'm torn. I mean , I know that this is not the same wine, but have my two days here suddenly turned me into a stupid wine expert. But I have to know. This wine is different and I need to know if it is the glass, the bottle, or just me smoking crack.
I consider doing nothing and dealing with it, but the glass I have is terrible, so I have to ask.
“Um, are you sure this is the same wine ?”
He just shrugs. “Yes”
“Really sure ? Perhaps this glass wasn't washed properly ?”
“I'm sure it was, but how about I just pour you another glass”
So he reaches into the fridge and pulls out a completely different bottle. I point this out to him.
“Oh, then I gave you a glass of the Pinot grigio”
At that point we are both exonerated. He screwed up and I can't tell when I've been given a completely different glass of wine
La dolche vita.
